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Mean Joe

My Brother Joe, the Plumber and Why What He Thinks Really Matters

I know Joe. He lives in my town. I grew up with him. He’s my brother. Let me tell you about Joe because he’s a regular kind of guy. You know the kind of guy who has been running the government for the past eight years. What he thinks can mean a lot to everyone else, and what happens to Joe matters too.

Joe is a great friend and a wonderful brother. Every time I need him, he’s there for me. He’s older than I am, and I can count on him to come and help out any time I need something fixed, carried, or done around my apartment. He’s even got a handy truck to haul my furniture any time I move, unless it’s in the winter when he’s deer hunting.

Now Joe didn’t like school much. He said it was a drag. He and I used to quarrel about books and English classes and stuff like that. “Now don’t be some smarty pants, ”he said. “Just be an ordinary person because that’s really all a true American should be. So you be careful, and don’t get too ahead of yourself.”

Joe’s got a flag on the front porch of his house. It’s been there ever since I remember. I think that’s great, but I asked him why. He said he didn’t like those foreigners coming across the border, and he wanted to make sure that he staked out his place in the country so everyone would know he isn’t some wetback here illegally. Those complainers without flags: well, they just ought to leave the country if they have some quarrel with it, he said. He wants to make sure that people know he doesn’t complain.

My brother and I don’t see eye to eye on many things. I recently went to a Moslem mosque to interview a woman who has been teaching children in Dubai. She’s the sister of the chief of police in my town. Joe was pretty upset with me. He said if I didn’t stop associating with terrorists he’d disown me.

I went to a party the other night and got a ride home with this great fellow that I had been talking with at work for a long time. He’s smart, attractive and earns a good living, has a fine sense of humor, and just graduated from Harvard. I asked my brother if he’d like to meet him, and he said, “Why would I want to meet some intellectual elite? I hope you don’t get serious with him because he’ll never be able to understand common sense things. Men like him don’t understand guys like me. Well, I’ll bet he doesn’t even own a gun.”

The other day Joe and I showed up at our city council meeting. Joe took off his hat right away and led people in the Pledge of Allegiance. He always likes to do that, so he’s called upon at every community meeting to lead the people in the Pledge. Joe said that’s a great American symbol that’s been around ever since the country declared its independence from England. The guy who wrote it, he said, was a real patriot and George Washington was smart to add the words under God right away.

Joe and his girlfriend separated several months ago. I felt sorry for him; he’s was really sad about it. He said they couldn’t agree on children. Not that they both didn’t want them, but she said she’d like to wait a year or two before having a baby. Besides her family wanted her to be cautious about getting pregnant because she has severe diabetes, and they weren’t sure it would be good for her health. Joe said he didn’t want to marry a woman who was afraid to take chances, especially when he wanted a son to carry on his name. If she got pregnant, no matter what, he wanted her to have that baby. Joe told me, “now what was that woman thinking that her body was hers, when everyone knows it’s mine. After all, I got her first; and if she got knocked up, I said to her, she ought to be just like every woman is and have that baby for her man like other women do.” Joe couldn’t imagine she didn’t want to get pregnant right away and believes that the fact she didn’t is just a bunch of liberal, lesbian, big-government nonsense.

Now my Joe isn’t really Joe the plumber, but he certainly exists in my town, just like he does in yours. He’s a good brother, thoughtful and ready to help any member of the family who needs him. He’s a loyal American and would defend America if asked. So I love him. I just worry about Joe and how his vision multiplied by many can influence the outcome of elections and create long-term problems. So while I’ll always love Joe, I’ll worry about him at the same time because there’s a whole wide wonderful world he’ll never know exists.

About the Author

Carol Forsloff is a professional journalist/editor/publisher who has written extensively and has several books in print, one of which is Sarah Palin: Hot Ticket to Nowhere, now available for download at http://www.sarahpalinsecretlife.com. The online edition of her paper is http://www.therealviews.com, her blog coffeewithcarol.blogspot.com. Stop by and read Carol's advice since she is a licensed counselor, information on education from her teaching background and commentaries on social and political events from her background as journalist.

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